I guess wandering a weird place just to listen to strangers is normal for a super-anxious person…I guess…

As writers, we hear all the time that we’ve got to hook readers in just the first few pages or else. We’ve got to hook agents in the first few pages or else.

Whether you’re looking to get published or just hoping to hook your reader, first impressions are vital. Compelling opening scenes are the key to catching an agent or editor’s attention, and are crucial for keeping your reader engaged.
JEFF GERKE, THE FIRST FIFTY PAGES

This month I snagged from the New Release shelf:

Our Last Resort by Clémence Michallon

I have a feeling I’m going against the flow with this one. Our Last Resort by Clémence Michallon has an enticing premise: the protagonist Frida and her brother are visiting a secluded desert resort in Utah. According to the book’s blurb, they had escaped a cult together fifteen years ago, and soon her brother will be the prime suspect in a series of murders. What could possibly go wrong with such a premise?!

For the record, I’ve nothing against the premise. The sibling relationship is effectively portrayed in the first chapter before the brother’s even had a chance to speak. There is also a brief flashback to Frida’s childhood, alluding to the violence inflicted on children who try to seek help from the outside. All this is masterfully done by Michallon.

However, the opening chapter focuses on Frida sneaking out of her suite to eavesdrop on a couple by the pool: a tabloid publisher and his hot young wife. Why did Frida sneak out to look at them? There is no clear motivation. She heard the couple and decided to go listen to them. That’s it. The first page had us learning about Frida’s frantic triple-checking of her apartment every night, but at this hotel, she’s totally cool leaving at random to listen to people. Another couple of pages in the publisher threatens violence to his wife, which causes Friday to remember her child abuse, and THAT could have made for good motivation, but before it’s just talking. And in this tense moment of hiding and possible violence, Frida starts describing the resort’s landscaping. It’s an odd mix to me, and I can’t wrap my head around what Michallon’s aiming for here. Perhaps some quirky juxtaposition, perhaps some intentional delaying of relaying action to build tension, I don’t know. But as a writer, this structure doesn’t seem to fit. Writers may be able to play around with character motivation and structure a bit more after the story’s established itself, but in the first chapter, it is CRUCIAL that readers see motivation and action sync up. And I just don’t see them syncing up here.

Let’s see what next month’s find will teach us, shall we?

Next week I will be OFF! Yes, off. I’ve loved getting on here weekly, but I’m determined to focus on family as we travel to The North Woods for a brief spell. Never fear: I’ll be back the following weekend with another author interview, a resource spotlight, a guest post from my daughter Blondie (yay!), and our final installment of summer camp. Stay tuned!

Read on, share on, and write on, my friends!