To attempt, to brave, to persist, and persevere, to be faithful to one’s self…

Victor Hugo

Welcome back, my fellow creatives!

You may have noticed that things look a little different around Jean Lee’s World. After ten years with the same WordPress theme, I decided it was time to change things up a bit. 🙂 I’m still in the process of simplifying some of the widget stuff and making sure all the content is updated, but I dig this new organization. Any feedback is appreciated!

So admittedly, I dug up my five-year anniversary blogpost to see what milestones gave me pause. My little B’s were indeed little and adorable, and the pandemic had not yet taken hold in the United States.

Five more years. So much changes, and yet doesn’t.

Blondie continues to draw and revel in artistic challenges. She continues to build her skills on the piano. But she’s also learning to be her own person in high school and to overcome fears of physical activity.

I don’t want her breaking her leg again, either, but fear cripples just as badly, if not more so. And so Bo and I nudge her as best we can to step out, step up, and leave that fear behind. How have we started? By encouraging her to be on the Forensics team. And our blond ham made Varsity! She loves playing Michael Palin’s part in the Lion Tamer Sketch from Monty Python.

Life with Autism has altered the lens for Biff and Bash. Biff is still our intense learner, our student of all things mechanical and intergalactic. He still buries himself in soft, colorful stuffed animals, each one a beloved, dear friend. But he’s also discovering that scary things can also be fun–that there’s a thrill to the jumpscare, there’s a delight in surprise. He spends hours drawing haunted places, yearning to build his own.

Bash still struggles with the fear of failure and being excluded. He still immerses himself in the world of Transformers from across the decades, keen to understand how every single iteration of Optimus Prime compares. He can wile away an afternoon acting out epic battles, or drawing up plans for totally new Transformers. But as you saw in my fall posts, he is eager to study new robots, too, and ready to draw them with his own Bashy flair. I could see this little one becoming the next Dav Pilkey if he ever brought his art and storytelling together.

Success is not final, failure is not fatal: it is the courage to continue that counts.

Winston Churchill

Looking back at WordPress’ insights from 2015-2025, it’s interesting to see the peaks and valleys of my online content and interaction. I had no presence as an author when I started in February 2015, so every single view of my site was a big deal to me. What started with a few dozen views that first month rose up to thousands of views every month in 2019-2021. 2019 was my peak year, which tracks with my first novel’s release in late 2018; I was also teaching part-time and all three of my kids were regularly in school, so I could commit more time and effort in the blogging sphere.

I tried out new stories with my Shield Maiden series about Gwen and Wynne, and I got to work on some novellas set in my Fallen Princeborn universe: one a western, one a horror. When I started teaching full-time in 2020, aaaaaaaaaaaall that shifted, even with my second novel’s publication. By 2022, I was starting to burn out and unsure how to continue. Even focusing strictly on the book review podcast didn’t feel like enough. You know the rest with my complete break in 2023.

I admit that cynicism got me for a while: that there was no way I could have time for a personal passion in the midst of supporting my family. And after working with a publisher for one book and by myself for another, how did I want to pursue publication this time? Go super-traditional and seek an agent, or go independent once more?

Then Bo reminded me that I was psyching myself out. “Why don’t you just focus on writing the story first so you have something to publish?”

True. Can’t exactly market what doesn’t exist yet. I mean, I could try, and I’m still eying books on book proposals for tips on creating that ultimate package for the trilogy when the time comes. But that’s just it–when the time comes. The first book should still be completed before I take those next steps.

So let’s look ahead. It’s time to make the goals real. After all, part of my academic work is to meet yearly goals in service and scholarship, which includes creative endeavors. Where do we go from here?

“Brave admiral, say but one good word:
What shall we do when hope is gone?”
The words leapt like a leaping sword:
“Sail on! sail on! sail on! and on!”

Joaquin Miller

The first one is going strong so far: I’m back to regular output here with a degree of interaction. Thank YOU, each and every one of you, for being here with me and pushing me onward!

Little by little, I will save up to buy the rights back to my first novel, and once that happens, I’ll find my way back to River Vine. I can republish the short stories I had initially used for marketing, and we can finally get that third novel with all its magical mayhem into readers’ hands.

Until then, we’ll lose ourselves in the stars.

It’s been a while since I’ve immersed myself in this level of world-building before. Fallen Princeborn: Stolen took ten years to write because there were many days I couldn’t write the story itself (toddlers aren’t keen on folks sitting still at computers for long), but I could dabble in magic rules, or language, or environment.

I don’t want to take ten years this time, especially if I want to have half of Line the Stars drafted by the end of June. Will all the worldbuilding be sorted out by then? Likely not. But the major elements–the composition of the star-crafts, for instance, and the rules of science and magic–should be defined because any first book into an Elsewhere must be clear about how that Elsewhere operates. No one appreciates constantly moving goalposts. This will also help me finalize my outline for the trilogy so that all the major plot points will tie together as they should.

Yes, there is a lot to do. A heeeeeeeeelluva lot to do. But the look ahead no longer stresses or exhausts.

It excites. There’s a new world out there, beyond this wintry horizon.

Let’s see what’s out there.

Stay tuned! I’ve got interviews lined up alongside digging into that galactic world-building. Plus, we’ll touch on the music of villains and heroes while reflecting on one struggle we all face, but doubly so when you’re Autistic: Growing Up.

Read on, share on, and write on, my friends!